To continue this topic of the Yogi, I must digress for a moment...

When we first arrived in California, we went to Santa Monica Pier where we saw a man with his pet parrots, about 6 of them (a macaw, a cockatoo, etc.). The birds sit on branches he has attached to his bicycle. Unfortunately I didn't get a photo of this. But as I watched, people would approach him to see the birds and he would place a parrot on their shoulder, hand or arm in one fell swoop before the person could protest or even move. The parrots were absolutely and incredibly tame and behaved friendly and calm. I was completely rapt in observing this as I love parrots so much. I used to have cockatoos and other native Australian birds come around to visit me in my backyard where I would give them scraps of food and observe their behaviour and interact with them...but then I got chihuahuas about 3 years ago and they will have none of that! They chased every last bird away from the yard and warned them to never return. So I've really missed being in the presence of magnificent birds.

Anyway, this guy was doing such a service IMO in helping people overcome their initial fear of big birds so they could enjoy the amazing spirit of these bird in such an intimate way. It took me a long time to be able to feed the native cockies from my hand to their beak, so I can truly relate to this fear. Those beaks are so powerful and it really is scary to contemplate how quickly and easily they could snip off a finger.

I went over for a turn at observing the parrots. After three years I was nervous at the thought of a big beaked bird on my arm, but before I could decide, the owner flung a bird onto me. The bird got right up next to my face and began making kissing noises as it tried to get close to my lips. I caught that familiar scent of fermented seeds on its breath. I saw up-close the depth of intelligence and fierce, feral power in its eye. But this man had these parrots so well trained and so contained within his will that no matter the fear I exuded (and I did a bit), the bird did not react.

After handing back the bird and marvelling at it all, he next (without asking) grabbed my arms, shaped them into a cradle, and plonked a big bird (I think it was the macaw) on its back into my arms like a baby. It lay there completely submissively. This guy is beyond words in my esteem. It was a magical, heavenly experience for me that was one of the best moments I've ever had.

Anyway, as I reluctantly walked away (though I had to as it was so intense and others were waiting for a turn), I prayed that I could have another experience with parrots. I noted how rare an opportunity it was and wondered would I have another bird encounter soon, since I did really want it and had actually prayed for it, though it seems so unlikely.

I basically forgot about my prayer. But I spent most of my time away contemplating spirit, reading about manifesting reality, and trying to open my mind. Weeks later when I was staying at a resort near San Diego, I was given a piece of paper that listed local main attractions and some of the more obscure ones. One of these smaller attractions was a bird rescue/sanctuary. We went to it. There were tons of parrots just hanging out. I was given some food to feed them and was free to walk around and interact with them. They seemed much less tame, but just as magical. I realized my prayer was answered and being around the birds gave me such energy and really boosted my feelings of love and wonder - not to mention strengthening my belief in prayer.

Gee, I did digress...

At the end of the day, as I sat upon the big white luxurious bed at the resort, watching TV, I saw a blue light in the corner of the room. It was on my left and seemed connected to my left eye. The light formed a figure 8, but was more 3-D and on its side like the infinity symbol. It spun for a few seconds before it vanished or faded. I thought, What the heck was that?! I knew I was in for a big night of spirit, and I felt it was in connection with the parrots and how they made me feel.

At bed time later, when I walked up to the bed, I saw spirit faces in the folds of the linen. The faces were all alike, some small and some large. It was a human face with an aquiline nose reminding me of a parrots beak (I realized the next day that this nose was very similar to Yogi's, and while I feel it was Yogi, I cannot say for sure). As I lay in bed lights and shadows moved swiftly about the room, but I was tired, wanted to sleep, so I drifted off.

I was awakened shortly after by the shaking of the bed. It was rather insistent and quite strong, but I instantly knew it was happening on another level (and not an earthquake - I don't think). I felt I was to wake up and pay attention. It was a little bit confronting and scary, as it often is, but my logic advised me it was spirit and to be cool.

I lay there drifting in an alpha state when I saw the entity that was trying to get my attention. It looked like the faces I'd seen in the bed folds. I saw several entities and realized they were hidden in between the levels of this world and whatever else there is. I knew they were immortals. The one said, "Don't you recognize me?" But I didn't at that point.

Every time I started to fall to far asleep, I'd be awakened. This went on for hours and hours until about 4 am. At one point I heard "kill yourself" which shocked me fully awake, but then I realized it meant to kill the "self"/ego and not literally the body. In fact, as I realized this, the entity told me that to literally kill myself would be ironic and merely participating in the illusion of life and of course that was not what had been meant. The entity/immortals told me throughout the night to consume the "light" offering me an astral nugget of gold light upon a flame to eat. But I don't recall the act of consuming it so I still wonder if I did. As I came to full consciousness I heard myself asking how long it would last (the nugget/light). I think I meant how much energy would it give me or for how long.

Unfortunately, this is all just one more piece in the puzzle of what the heck am I doing here and what am I supposed to be doing!!?! In one instance I feel I know and understand more, and in another, I feel more confused and unsure. Writing this out does help some and I realize more now that I've organized my thoughts into writing. He/They also advocated not eating meat, calling it "blood money" (not the first time a spirit has counselled me on this, though I still eat meat). And I think the suggestion was to not eat food at all. Breatharianism it is!